Learning to lose with dignity

Atiku lost in 2007.

Buhari lost in 2007 and 2011.

Obi lost in 2023.

Yet in almost every case, large segments of supporters refused to concede. The default explanation was electoral shenanigans, not strategic failure. Rarely did we examine campaign weaknesses, poor coalition-building, fragmented opposition, or ineffective messaging.

Take 2023 as a practical lesson. The eventual winner secured a plurality — a minority victory. If the major opposition figures had run on a joint ticket, their combined votes would have been overwhelming. The arithmetic was clear. The opposition was divided; the ruling party was consolidated. That is political reality, not conspiracy theory.

But instead of studying that lesson, we returned to the familiar script: blame the system.

This mentality does not begin in politics. It begins early. In school, when students fail examinations, they accuse teachers of reducing their scores and giving marks to classmates. In sports, fans blame referees rather than admit their team lacked discipline or tactics. In offices, when promotions do not come, we blame tribe, religion, or favouritism — rarely performance or work ethic.

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Even in daily life, we deflect responsibility. Road accidents are blamed on witches. Illnesses are blamed on jealous relatives. Misfortune is rarely seen as the product of natural causes, human error, or preventable risk.

In Nigeria, almost nobody dies naturally, someone must have spiritually “done it.” This is a country that still believes that there is ritual money and that you can get rich by sacrificing someone’s life. I wonder how many life’s the Bill Gates, Elon Musk’s and Jeff Bezos’ of the world have sacrificed, right?

This culture of externalizing blame is deeply corrosive. It prevents learning and accountability. It prevents growth. It prevents institutional trust. And in the political sphere, it creates something even more dangerous: instability and political gangsterism.

When citizens are conditioned to believe that every loss is illegitimate, elections become triggers for unrest. Anger spreads quickly. Institutions lose credibility. Opportunistic actors exploit the chaos. What begins as disappointment can escalate into violence.

A democracy cannot survive if its participants only believe in it when they win. Mature societies understand something simple: In every contest, there are two possible outcomes: victory or defeat. If you are not prepared for both outcomes, you are not prepared for competition.

Nigeria’s future depends not just on electoral reform, but on cultural reform. We must teach our children that failure is not fraud. We must teach our politicians that defeat is not humiliation. We must teach ourselves that accountability begins inward, not outward.

Accepting loss does not weaken a nation. It strengthens it. Because once you admit you lost fairly, you can ask the only question that matters: What must we do better next time?

Until we learn that lesson, we will continue to recycle outrage instead of progress and that is a far greater threat to Nigeria than any election result.

Nigeria must learn how to lose. Only then can it truly learn how to win.

•Nosa Osaikhuiwu,

Texas, United States of America.